My name is Pepper Schwartz, I’m Professor of Sociology at the University of Washington in Seattle, Washington.

My presentation was on sexuality in committed couples. By that I mean long-term couples: married, cohabiting, gay men, lesbians, in relationships that are expected to go on indefinitely – or sometimes they don’t – but to distinguish them from casual relationships.

What are the most interesting aspects of your studies?
Well, I think one of the most interesting new discoveries about sexuality in committed couples is that it’s good for their mental and physical health as well as for their personal satisfaction and their relationship satisfaction. Some of the data on sex in couples is really correlated with helping their physical ability to withstand stress and to create an immunity, in some ways, against some of the things that attack them. For example, there’s a wonderful study showing that when couples hold hands – compared to couples who don’t hold hands – they have lower cortisol levels, which indicate stress, and lower blood pressure, even when they’re having stress over conflict. So I think that this fact of bonding is not just for physical pleasure, but it is actually an emotional and mental buffer against the world.

What factors contribute to a healthy long-term relationship?
Well, I think relationship durability is based on a lot of happiness between the two people. After all, relationships are a choice in this day and age, not an assignment. And one of the things that brings couples happiness and closeness is sexual intimacy. And sexual intimacy is produced under the conditions of goodwill and happiness that the couple produces for each other. And that’s very much linked to communication skills. A lot of very interesting work is going on now on the impact of communication, and by communication I mean disclosure, and the ability to be articulate about one’s wants and needs. So those kinds of skills readily translate into the ability to feel closer together, and that translates into more sexual desire, for both men and women, but it’s particularly important for women, and that translates into relationship durability, stability, and happiness. So sexuality is very much central to couples’ happiness, but also to their chances of maintaining that relationship, and that’s bolstered by communication skills, which involve both sexual and non-sexual disclosure. I think that communication – good communication – about both sexual and non-sexual issues will translate itself into happiness and to closeness, and that will translate itself into more sexual desire and more sexual frequency, and that will be linked to relationship stability and satisfaction.